People are used that a mother is a person to have the prevailing custody over kids after divorce. But it doesn’t mean that a divorced dad will do worse as a single parent. The only thing is to have the desire and put enough effort to care about the children in the best possible way.
If you still hesitate whether becoming a custodial father is the right choice, here are some points for you to dwell on. Discover the pros and cons of taking the role of a single divorced dad and find out whether it suits you.
Ups
Doing solo parenting can bring numerous opportunities and joys to your life, especially after the burden and stress of divorce. Check out the perks of being a single divorced dad and enjoy your choice in full.
1. The Only Boss
There will only be you to manage the household and the kids. You will be the one to settle the rules and make the final decisions. If you don’t like the parenting style of your ex-wife, here you have the moment of glory to apply your visions to children’s upbringing.
Still, it doesn’t mean you will do what you want. You should prioritize the physical and emotional wellness of your kids and act appropriately. Use tips for divorced dads from credible sources to guide you.
2. More Time With Kids
Fathers usually are breadwinners in the family, so they barely see the kids, spending more time at work. But becoming a single dad, you grab the possibility to participate in every aspect of your children’s life. School, extracurricular activities, personal issues. Your kids will need your advice, presence, and active participation. You will soon get great pleasure from spending time with kids and becoming more important to them.
3. Close Relationships With Children
As a result of more time spent together, you will strengthen the relationships with children. If you care about your kids and are always open to being by their sides, you will get rewarded soon. Your bonds with kids will get stronger; they will trust and love you more.
But it all depends on the strategy you choose when nurturing them. Never try to buy your kids’ affection, or you may spoil them. Remember to care and love but discipline your children for their and your benefit.
4. You Are Appreciated
Maybe it was you who initiated a quick divorce at https://onlinedivorcer.com/online-divorce-arizona. Maybe your ex-spouse is nothing but a good person. It is just the circumstances that made you choose to be a single father and your ex to step aside.
But people around you don’t know about the details, and they will make their assumptions. Commonly, people think that your ex-wife did something wrong and left. And you being almost the saint gathered the courage and sacrificed everything to care about your kids. Even if it is fully or partially untrue, it is still pleasant to feel appreciated and respected by people around you.
Downs
As long as it brings a list of pleasantries, being a single dad is a serious challenge. And you have to get prepared to cover the hurdles awaiting you.
1. Full Responsibility
The biggest burden of being a divorced dad is that you are to take full responsibility for your actions, for your kids, and their deeds as well. If troubles arise, your wife won’t be by your side to encourage and support you. You will be the only adult to make the right decision and hold responsibility for the outcomes.
Yet, if you are single, it doesn’t mean you have to struggle alone. It is sensible to reach for help when you need it. Your friends and relatives may be eager to assist you just waiting for your sign. There are also online and offline support groups and communities giving all sorts of help for you to benefit from.
2. A Challenge to Balance Work and Home
Since you have to guarantee the wellness of your children on your own, it is evident that you are to spend much time working. And when you are not, there is an endless list of activities to do with your kids: school, interest clubs, doctor’s appointments, homework. Add house chores and cooking, and you will get your head spinning and back aching.
You cannot give up on any of the duties, so your task is to organize your time in a way to manage everything successfully and remain a joyful and supportive dad for your beloved kids.
3. Poor Social Life
With such a crammed schedule, there is no wonder you will have no time for social life. Forget about beer at a pub with your buddies or date nights. Your socializing will be limited to other parents with kids of the same age when attending another birthday party.
Still, you can find your way to relax and get satisfied with different leisure activities. Just look for the leisure options both you and your kids like and spend great quality time together. If you lack ideas, reach blogs and groups with divorce advice for fathers, and you will encounter a suitable option there to make your free time brighter.
Final Words
Whether you are a single mom or a divorced dad, your life isn’t cloudless. The high expectations of society burden you, the great responsibility doesn’t make it easier, you lack time, powers, and enthusiasm, you don’t care about your own wellness and desires anymore. Still, you may be the happiest person on the planet. You have the kids who love and respect you; you have a chance to nurture them well, to spend much time with them, to feel all pleasures and challenges of parenthood. Be strong and happy with such a great role you have.
